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I like mine young and tender. You can cook whole or snap them or cut them. I always pick mine while they are young and tender. If one gets to hard and has beans in it, I shell them out to cook. I do not do many that way. That is not the way I like them.
I pick them when they are about 3-4". I just snap the end off where it was attached to the plant and snap off the little pointy-end and cook them whole. The pods are edible. If you open them up and just eat the beans inside, you are throwing away most of the green bean. Same with Sugar Snap Peas. The pods are edible. Pick them very young, 3-4" at most, snap the ends off like the green beans, and cook them whole.
Definitely pick them before the beans develop, when they're young and thin. Then they'll be tender and not stringy.
Best is to toss them in a pot of boiling water, no longer than 5 minutes. Boiling them till they're soggy sort of eliminates the point of growing them fresh.
You can stir-fry young beans, too. The real question is: how do you like to eat fresh beans?