| Author |
Content |
Candyce
The Monadnock Region, NH
(Zone 5a)
August 15, 2007
10:44 AM Post #3859321
|
I have a feeling that this is something we all need. Yeah, it's great to put on a happy face and post all about our accomplishments and hear the praise coming in ... but, what about those times we just want to explode????? Like, how you are feeling after cleaning the kitchen and getting it all clean and shiny, and then someone goes and leaves dirty dishes on the sink counter? Urrrggghhhh!!!!
So, here's a thread where we can vent, and let it all out. If we do it amongst ourselves, then there's a less likely chance that we will 'blow up' in front of our dear family. |
Mobi
Denver, CO
(Zone 6a)
August 15, 2007
4:42 PM Post #3860623
|
I hate mopping the floor then the dogs come in with muddy feet. I can't get angry with them - they are doing dog things but I do get discouraged. |
Candyce
The Monadnock Region, NH
(Zone 5a)
August 15, 2007
5:01 PM Post #3860688
|
Oh yes, Mobi. That's for certain sure!! Dogs, and small children, can get under our skin when it comes to having things stay clean, if only for a few minutes. |
Texasgal77
Baytown, TX
(Zone 9a)
August 15, 2007
8:18 PM Post #3861448
|
The one time I didn't get the cat's litter box cleaned and floor swept in the bathroom, my Mom came over this am because her power went out. She is elderly and can't take the heat, so it was urgent that I go get her and not stop to do anything! How embarrassing!
She never comes over here except on Holidays and birthdays. I always go visit her. She said not to worry about it, and she understood. She was thankful just to be in the A/C!! But I was embarrassed. |
Candyce
The Monadnock Region, NH
(Zone 5a)
August 15, 2007
8:33 PM Post #3861499
|
Ohhhhhh!! I know! I know! I know!!
The daily cleaning of both litter boxes (we have four cats) is my DGD Sammi's job. I am so terrible about it, too! If I find that she hasn't scooped them by at least noon, I want to explode!!! I just hate the smell of dirty cat boxes.
Your mom was such a peach for understanding. And, you are simply marvelous for thinking of your mom and her health and well-being. |
Texasgal77
Baytown, TX
(Zone 9a)
August 15, 2007
8:47 PM Post #3861555
|
Thanks! She's a doll! One of my best friends, so even harder for her to see an unkept mess! But her safety had to take first priority over my pride! Thanks for your input! It helps! |
Yuska
San Antonio, TX
(Zone 8b)
August 15, 2007
8:48 PM Post #3861564
|
After scooping or changing the litter boxes, sprinkle in a little baking soda. Squelches the odor. |
Candyce
The Monadnock Region, NH
(Zone 5a)
August 16, 2007
9:01 AM Post #3863059
|
Yuska:
We put the baking soda in daily as well. It's a great trick to know, so I'm glad you brought it up. |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
August 18, 2007
5:14 PM Post #3871959
|
Here, here.
The shoes in the house. This burns my cookies! If the family had to run
the Hoover, they would get it. Lately I've been keeping the vac in the pantry,
all plugged in. When hubby comes towards the door, I run the vac. Can't
miss a hint like a roaring vac when you walk in the door, eh?
Why, why, why, must hubby make such a mess in the kitchen? Is there
anything difficult about salt and peppering things in the sink instead of
on the counter top?
When you hear the washer and dryer going, is there any reason why it
does not click in your head "Mom is doing laundry. I think I'll bring my dirty
clothing to the laundry room."
When the kitchen is spotless, why must you use the largest, heaviest
stoneware for a few slices of watermelon?
The house did not clean itself. Compliments go far when I'm thinking of
what to cook for supper.
How do you think the trash disappears each day? How did those
clean clothes get into your closet?
Ah, I feel much better, thanks!
|
Candyce
The Monadnock Region, NH
(Zone 5a)
August 19, 2007
7:53 AM Post #3873568
|
You're welcome!! |
kyjoy
Frankfort, KY
August 21, 2007
3:14 PM Post #3882752
|
One of my earliest memories is that we had to get rid of our dog because our housekeeper got mad when it tracked the floor. I am 71 yrs. of age now; I was three then. I have never forgotten nor have I ever forgiven her. |
Bettypauze
Victoria Harbour, ON
(Zone 5b)
August 21, 2007
3:20 PM Post #3882785
|
well, since I live on my own, I'd be in trouble if I posted a pet peeve with regards to household chores lol |
ByndeweedBeth
scio, oregon, OR
(Zone 8a)
August 21, 2007
3:22 PM Post #3882797
|
I would never forgive "getting rid of the dog" for a few tracks on the floor. Hearing that just makes me mad! |
Candyce
The Monadnock Region, NH
(Zone 5a)
August 21, 2007
3:32 PM Post #3882851
|
That's a terrible way to treat an animal. No wonder it left an impression on you. Poor you, and poor little doggie! Now, THAT woman was certainly an angry person, don't you think? It sounds like she thought chores were something that she HAD to do, rather than doing chores because she wanted to show her family how much she loved them. |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
August 21, 2007
4:03 PM Post #3882964
|
LOL Betty, now that would be quite an issue. ;-) |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
September 3, 2007
1:10 AM Post #3930684
|
Ugh, can you believe hubby didn't even buy me a card for our anniversary never mind a gift!!!!
Big deal we went to dinner without the kiddies, big dippity do! |
nanny_56
Putnam County, IN
(Zone 5b)
September 4, 2007
1:39 PM Post #3936375
|
Dh leaves just enough TP on the roll so he doesn't have to change it!! Doesn't put dirty dishes in the diswasher and I about fell out last night when he walked the dog (and he is the one that wanted and picked out this little guy!!!!)
This message was edited Sep 5, 2007 9:25 AM |
larlienda
Strasburg, VA
(Zone 6b)
September 5, 2007
6:34 AM Post #3938909
|
one of the things that gets me is over-filling the trash can AND then piling the rest of the trash on top instead of changing the trash bag...also putting the recycables (sp) into the trash instead of the appropriate bag next to the trash...both of these "tricks" adds up to major yuck! |
Bettypauze
Victoria Harbour, ON
(Zone 5b)
September 7, 2007
12:47 PM Post #3947676
|
know you'll want to slap me crazy girls...but oh how I wish my DH was here to leave his clothes all over the washroom floor, dishes in the zinc...forgetting the garbage...hmmm hind sight is 20/20 .. sure do MISS those things...and boy will you miss them as well...give your hubby a big hug/kiss tonight...those are but little things of life are all about... I know/I know get off this thread right..you did say 'a place to vent' venting that I sure miss my DH and all those little things that drove 'me' crazy as well...something to think about... |
Candyce
The Monadnock Region, NH
(Zone 5a)
September 15, 2007
6:09 AM Post #3977300
|
Betty:
I know what you mean, and it's perfectly OK.
My DDH has been gone a year, and even though we were divorced, it was very hard. I miss some, but not all, of the aggravation. |
Terri1948
Yorkshire
()
September 15, 2007
6:35 AM Post #3977321
|
Candy, my pet vent is telling people how fortunate they are to actually have those people/pets who mess up the place 'in their lives'. LOL
Betty, well said!!
I was just thinking exactly what you wrote. I will always remember one elderly neighbour who was forever grumbling and moaning at her husband about the mess he left around (ie, breakfast dishes in the sink, shoes in the hallway, etc) I would always stay neutral when she grumbled to me and tell her, 'Ah, but he's always there when you need him.' After he died she told me one day that she'd do 'anything and more' to be tripping over his shoes in the hallway. I suppose we will always find things to grumble about...we're human, after all. I used to moan and groan about having to wipe my dogs footprints off the white doorstep, now I would paint that doorstep brown if only I could have my beautiful dog back with me (I had to have her put to sleep 4 years ago).
Oh NO!! My husband has just waterlogged all my seedlings - Trying to help out in the greenhouse, hahaha Off to tear my hair out :o)
Hugs
Terri
|
Petal33
Kingston, ON
(Zone 5b)
November 7, 2007
7:50 PM Post #4169133
|
I would just like my hubby to stop and think-"not everything else is "my job".
We run a home based business.I say "we' .I do alot for the business,packaging pick -up s answer phones-etc. Yet I don't get payed and am told I do nothing.
He always say's he going to fire the maid -I shug,,gotta pay her first...
And all home projects are not "my responsiblity"- I only have two hands and alot of jobs reqiure three..
Next - he always go to bed early ,to curl up and relax .
I'm up late ,sometimes till 2am trying to get house hold work done...
|
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
November 7, 2007
9:54 PM Post #4169554
|
Petal,
It can get discouraging, can't it?
I often think how wonderful it would be to just go to work, come
home, do a few things like feed the chickens and call it a day.
Wouldn't it be nice if husbands did the laundry, cleaned house,
cooked dinner, paid the bills, ran the errands, mowed the yard,
weed eat, tend the gardens, tend the children, tend the pets,
fetch firewood, made the beds and all that each day brings?
Sigh. Must be nice. Yet the moment we take pleasure in a bubble
bath to reward ourselves, everyone's at the bathroom door wanting
to get it or wanting something.
Ah, thank goodness for chocolate. |
larlienda
Strasburg, VA
(Zone 6b)
November 8, 2007
8:50 AM Post #4170768
|
very thankful for chocolate & lately rice pudding...my husband doesn't understand why i don't want horses right now with 3 children 22 mos apart and the oldest daughter is special needs and the younger ones patterning their behavior after her (a lot of risky behavior and impulse driven)...we have dogs, cats, ducks, goats, geese & chickens and he rolls his eyes if i ask him to take a full bucket of water to the chickens or fill the feeders...hmmm, wonder why i don't want horses until all the young ones are in school...he said he'd be able to take care of them...i laughed :-)
he commutes almost two hours each way to work and puts in 10-12 hours while he's there yet he is going to take care of them
it's nice being able to vent! |
nanny_56
Putnam County, IN
(Zone 5b)
November 8, 2007
3:22 PM Post #4172181
|
He pays the bills, most of them oline. A click of the mouse right?? so you would think he could get to them and not pay late fees...noooooo. But fusses at me for how much I spend at Wal-Mart. Toilet handle broke in one bathroom for 3-4 months now. Does not if we can afford a new one. HUH??????? Is he planning on getting platnium or what! |
larlienda
Strasburg, VA
(Zone 6b)
November 8, 2007
4:50 PM Post #4172460
|
we have the same deal except it's a leaky faucet on the clawfoot tub...to minimize leak have to turn hot water off by contorting as much as possible to reach under and back
it's been added to the list for about a year now...he only has so much time in a day...but no way does he want to decide on any of the to-do's as being something we could just pay someone else to do because it's not like we are printing money to cover everything ;-)
perhaps a week or two of ramen noodles would provide enough money for someone to fix the faucet... |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
November 8, 2007
5:04 PM Post #4172520
|
LOL Larlienda, re: ramen noodles for a week.
If I did that to save money to pay someone to do things around
here, I'd have them for breakfast, lunch and supper.
Ha ha!
|
nanny_56
Putnam County, IN
(Zone 5b)
November 8, 2007
7:51 PM Post #4173174
|
My husband took last friday off. Wanted a day where he didn't 'have to do anything.' I couldn't help but comment that sound ed really nice, sure wish I could have one!! lol
The kicker was that the sunday before he was in his jammies until 2pm when the neighbor started to mow and woke him up from his nap!!
I finally put up up the new towel bar that I bought back in February, last week.
I love the man. We have been married for 34 yrs. but geesh! |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
November 13, 2007
11:20 AM Post #4188692
|
Okay, I just have to comment about a quote I heard on Law & Order sometime back.
The detectives are questioning this guy about where he was during some crime and he says that he has an alibi because he was babysitting his kids.
Immediately, the female detective pipes up and says, "IT'S NOT BABYSITTING IF THEY ARE YOUR KIDS!"
I just love that quote, particularly since we have an 11 month old. |
larlienda
Strasburg, VA
(Zone 6b)
November 13, 2007
11:26 AM Post #4188703
|
so true, so true
luckily my dh agrees with that statement although i have known some people over the years who's husbands felt it was babysitting and that they were doing them a great favor...
same attitude can apply to changing diapers which again i'm lucky as my husband has changed some hideous diapers |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
November 13, 2007
11:35 AM Post #4188727
|
If I only had a nickel for every time I've heard a man
say "I'm watching the kids while she goes shopping."
Shouldn't they be watching the kids regardless?
Ugh. |
threegardeners
North Augusta, ON
(Zone 5a)
November 13, 2007
5:56 PM Post #4189892
|
It would be nice if:
he could pour a coffee without pouring it on the floor, cupboards, counter.
he could get undressed before getting into bed.
he could actually put something in the garbage can--anything!!
he could put things away after using them---almost hate to have him do something for me cause it takes me a half hour to clean up his mess after.
he could put his dirty clothes in one or two places instead of me having to do a treasure hunt looking for them when it's laundry time.
he would be grateful for what we have instead of always whining about what we don't have..
if he would quit living in the past
and it would be nice if he didn't have this uncanny ability to know when I've about had enough, and he does something really super nice and i totally forget all the things I've been complaining about and forgive him...but he does have the ability..and I always forget the bad stuff.
|
shune
Seattle, WA
(Zone 8a)
November 13, 2007
6:02 PM Post #4189901
|
Hi, I should introduce myself, I'm one of your 'watchers'. I lurk more than chat. I'm a quiet one! Anyhow, I have wanted to add to this thread, now I finally will...
The thing that gets to me is that I do all the cooking and any cleaning that is done (not enough!) It has become his responsibility to do the dishes. He still says: I washed your dishes, like he deserves an award or something.
Thanks for being here! |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
November 13, 2007
6:08 PM Post #4189915
|
Hello Shune!
Very happy to see you come out of lurkdom. Though we
certainly love our significant others, it does feel good to let it
out now and then. Your post reminds me of my father, who
lets my mother know that he has done things. It seems to go
back to childhood approval. LOL.
Threegardeners, you may as well have been describing my hubby.
The day I spout all of my complaints to my sister in law, the next
day he does something out of the blue to make me feel bad for
complaining. I told my S.I.L. that I was going to call her more often
even if I had to make something up. Ha!
|
threegardeners
North Augusta, ON
(Zone 5a)
November 13, 2007
6:08 PM Post #4189918
|
Hi Shune---welcome.
It's so true, they do one little thing and expect a reward, yet we do a thousand tasks and never get a word.
I feel much better now too---- |
threegardeners
North Augusta, ON
(Zone 5a)
November 13, 2007
6:09 PM Post #4189921
|
I can relate Wuvie--they are uncanny in their ability to know these things, aren't they? |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
November 13, 2007
6:17 PM Post #4189937
|
too funny, wuvie. welcome, shune.
Drives me crazy when there are a pile of crumbs on an otherwise spotless counter. Could they possibly clean up after themselves??? |
threegardeners
North Augusta, ON
(Zone 5a)
November 13, 2007
6:19 PM Post #4189941
|
or-----lol...the very day I get all the towels washed, he decides to bathe the dogs and dirties every single towel, and gets water all over the bathroom to boot.
|
shune
Seattle, WA
(Zone 8a)
November 13, 2007
6:24 PM Post #4189952
|
Thanks, I also see the empty cat food bag on the floor next to the food bowl. I've not picked it up yet and it's still there after DAYS... Guess I better pick it up myself. hee hee |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
November 13, 2007
6:25 PM Post #4189961
|
Partly in jest, I gave my son a laundry basket.
He asked "What is this?"
I replied "A present to your future wife." |
threegardeners
North Augusta, ON
(Zone 5a)
November 13, 2007
7:40 PM Post #4190198
|
LOL |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
November 14, 2007
9:59 AM Post #4191702
|
As far as dirty clothes go, if they aren't in the dirty clothes buckets (one in our room and one in the boys' bathroom), they don't get washed. Period! I am not going to hunt down laundry. It's just no that much fun for me! LOL! Also, if they pull their pants off and one leg is going one direction and one going the other, their boxers are still in them, etc., they get them back in the middle of their bedroom floor to fix. If they don't get them done before I do laundry, they don't get washed. My boys are 10 and 12 and I have figured out that we have been doing way too much stuff for them in an effort to save time.
My other pet peeves are leaving the TV/lights on or your chair pulled out from the table when you get up. I have been known to call them in from playing with their friends to make them come push their chair in. I could push it in, but then there is no inconvenience to them and the next time, they would just leave it out again. Not that this has worked perfectly, but hopefully it has helped a little.
Yes, I know, I am a mean mom. I have some one tell me that at least twice a week, so I figure I must be doing something right! |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
November 14, 2007
10:06 AM Post #4191728
|
LOL, reminds me of the things I used to, and at times still do.
Socks turned inside out? Not washing them. Pant legs half in
and half out? They will stay in the hamper until you fix them.
Stuff in the washer? Should have checked your pockets.
I wash dishes by hand several times a day, I refuse to use the
dishwasher. If you bring dishes to the kitchen and there are no
other dishes, you can simply turn on the faucet, push a pump of
soap, and wash the dish. Set it on a towel next to the sink and be
done with it.
Who decided the female should do these things? Isn't that odd?
I mean really, if you think about it, how strange that men are 'supposed'
to do certain things while the women stand around helpless? Or the
women are 'supposed' to do all the housekeeping while the men stand
around waiting for dinner?
It's 2007 in my house. LOL.
|
threegardeners
North Augusta, ON
(Zone 5a)
November 14, 2007
10:18 AM Post #4191773
|
I don't mind checking pockets, I have got some really nice tips doing that--the odd 10 or 20 dollar bill they forgot they had :))
My DH got messier after we decided that he would work and I would take care of the house---then his messiness increased by 1000%, now, I swear he goes out of his way to make a mess knowing I have to clean it up. |
Momtothree
Madison, AL
November 20, 2007
3:46 PM Post #4214449
|
Okay, I will add mine. My mom is a hoarder. Not the kind that have to be dug out (which you will see why below), just the kind that has way too much stuff and can never find ANYTHING, and so she's always buying replacements. I have noticed that she has begun to use my house as her off site storage facility. Once every few months, mom will get in a declutter mode. She will clean out a closet, or part of the attic. Now this is GOOD stuff and she can't just toss it, so she will call and visit me (luckily we live 2 hours away!) Sometimes she tells me stuff is coming, but more often than not, she just leaves it when she goes home. I mean an entire carload of STUFF. And then I feel guilty about not using it, so I try and put it to good use, but then resent that I have to store it for her.
Now I am NOT a hoarder. In fact, I am most at peace when the house is barren. The less stuff I have is the better and with three kids, that is hard enough to achieve on my own without mom's help. Today I was putting up Christmas decorations, and realize that most of it was stuff mom bought, used for a while and then decided I needed it. In fact, I did not "need" it, but it seems my neighbor across the street did. :) I did ask her and she was thrilled to have it so it is now hers.
Last year at Halloween, mom decided to not decorate. Too much trouble, to dirty... So she bought all her decorations to me. Then the day after Halloween, she called, she was shopping for, you guessed it, NEW DECORATIONS for Halloween.
It's not just decorations either. Thanks to mom, I have an over abundance of paper plates, material, toys.. the list goes on. When I talked to her Monday, she said, she was cleaning out closets and getting me some boxes of stuff she just knew I needed, and I could bring it home (in our car that barely sits the five of us) after Thanksgiving. I told her to find someone else, I didn't need it. When she asked, "Who?" I suggested, "The garbage man, he comes twice a week." Now she is mad at me, but I don't care. It's her garbage man or mine, and mine already has enough to do.
Thanks, I do feel better. |
threegardeners
North Augusta, ON
(Zone 5a)
November 20, 2007
5:04 PM Post #4214622
|
this thread is such a good idea!!!
I wish he'd use the ashtray--- I am tired of the inch long ash caterpillars on my keyboard, under light switches, in the bathroom.
I wish he'd put the lid back on--fish food, advil, mayo, you name it.
would I miss him if he weren't here? right this minute---no I would not!! |
pestee42
Molino, FL
(Zone 8b)
January 13, 2008
9:22 PM Post #4398036
|
Momtothree, Just a suggestion, tell your mom about free-cycle. If there is a group in her area she could post all her extras and someone would love to have them. My mom has done that to me too and I would feel guilty not taking the stuff so it just piled up in the extra bedroom. Then I felt stressful having that extra stuff looking at me everytime I went in there. I have been sorting and freecycling some stuff and it is a relief. I have had to start telling her no which is hard because I'm afraid if hurting her feelings. She just can't pass up a good deal when she finds it. |
mysterypoodle
Toddville, IA
(Zone 5a)
January 20, 2008
11:18 PM Post #4431280
|
I know I'm late to this thread, but may I add one? It's my mother-in-law. We get along really well, for the most part. But at Christmas, she came in to the kitchen and saw that I 'still' had the same picture on the wall that I'd had during summer and said "Oh, you're leaving that up year 'round to remind you of spring?"
It's a large original watercolor, triple-matted and in a lovely oak frame that matches my cupboards. I love the bright colors -- it's a scene with wheelbarrow and terra cotta pots and lots and lots of pansies.
I'm familiar with "accessorizing" for holidays and seasons, but with my real "artwork," I usually put it up and leave it up until I move or rearrange the room. Is this honestly an odd thing to do?
|
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
January 21, 2008
12:01 AM Post #4431448
|
Mystery,
Sounds like a mother in lawly thing to say.
Don't worry at all about it. Some people have that old school mentality of
doing things just so to fit the season, the month, the day. To me, this just
creates the need for so much excess stuff. Like the group who insisted on
putting the day of the week on panties. What were they thinking???
I love decor, I love seasonal stuff and I love holiday cutesies, too, but I'm
not going to fret over having a ceramic pumpkin in December. When and
if I get around to it, I'll stick it in a box.
As for the artwork, I say it's your home. If you want to display a Yule log in
spring, hey, you go. Whatever makes you happy makes me happy that you
are happy.
Next time your mother in law makes such a comment, tell her you are
leaving it there until she buys you something else. Heh heh.
KM |
mysterypoodle
Toddville, IA
(Zone 5a)
January 21, 2008
9:21 AM Post #4432146
|
>>Like the group who insisted on putting the day of the week on panties. What were they thinking???
LOL! That really puts it in perspective! Thanks! ;-)
|
Tir_Na_Nog
January 28, 2008
10:52 AM Post #4464411
|
Great thread topic!
Wuvie...ah-hem...I want a SIGNED copy of your first book!!!!!! Seriously, you need one. :)
Why do certain people (lol) think they need to make a sandwich on the counter with no plate? And then leave crumbs.
Why would someone get themselves out a cookie and walk around the house while munching on it. Do you want bugs to come and eat your crumbs? I hold my hand UNDER the cookie or eat it over the sink or use a plate.
*You may also want to view Control Freak Confessionals thread in GD forum* ROFLOL! |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
January 28, 2008
10:18 PM Post #4467292
|
What is the GD Forum?
My pet peeve - my husband 'helps' ME by doing the wash...(mostly his stuff) and then leaves it in the dryer for me to fold and put away. I hate to do the laundry as it is...and when it comes time to put the wet wash in the dryer...I first have to empty the thing.
It also drives me crazy when I have asked for help doing a project..and none is forthcoming but then when I start solo...the air is full of suggestions on how to do it better.
It drives me nuts when I cart my butt downstairs to get something from the fridge..or go to the toilet...or do a chore...and the voice from the peanut gallery says...'while you are up will you...do...get...bring..."
How many of you are asked by pals about how you are doing..or how something went and then after a mere 3 seconds lapse while you get your thoughts together you get interrupted and end up listening to a half hour of how someone else's day went?
Back in the early 70's, my MIL (God rest her sweet soul) was visiting me and my husband. I was a young bride. Mom still chafed about what she considered to be her only son's too quick courtship and marriage. She "did not have her son home from the service long enough to enjoy him." He was "too young to have such responsibilities." She worried that he had to work "too hard" to support his young family. One evening after a pretty nice dinner that I had put together for us (after working all day) she commented in front of my husband (who was ironing a shirt [this guy LIKES laundry] that she was disappointed that he had to do that for himself because he worked so hard... (I worked too)(and went to school) (and had an infant)..she mentioned that if he were back home, she would have those shirts ironed and ready to go . I piped up with .."well, Mom, actually, John DOES have some shirts that are in need of a mother's touch." Of course she had to say that she would do them the following day while we two were at work. That night, before bedtime, I got out a huge bag of shirts that I was getting ready to take to the church... there had to be at least 20 of them...(this was BEFORE permanent press or easy-iron materials ...just good ole 100% cotton). These shirts were sad: out of style...wearable but not pristine...some had neru collars! (SNORT) and I left them for her with an appropriate number of hangers and a can of starch. She knew they were not 'current' shirts... I knew they were not current shirts... she knew that I knew..I knew that she knew that I knew (you get it). She ironed every one of those shirts and after that ---I never heard one single criticism - outright or implied - about me or my housekeeping ever again. We had a great and loving and easy relationship until she passed. I miss her today. |
Tir_Na_Nog
January 28, 2008
10:41 PM Post #4467478
|
gd = general discussion |
pinkpoodlegirl
Rock Hill, SC
(Zone 7b)
January 29, 2008
11:41 AM Post #4469054
|
rosie...what a fabulous way to handle your MIL so early in the marriage! And the church got cleaned and pressed shirts. LOL |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
January 29, 2008
12:15 PM Post #4469224
|
P Poodle: Yeah, the only real danger there was - was that John may have wanted to wear that pressed and starched NERU shirt!! |
Bettypauze
Victoria Harbour, ON
(Zone 5b)
January 29, 2008
4:40 PM Post #4470245
|
lol..good for you..I wouldn't have been that bright or that courageous... |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
January 29, 2008
7:34 PM Post #4471013
|
I was a-fight-n for my life! |
pinkpoodlegirl
Rock Hill, SC
(Zone 7b)
January 29, 2008
9:58 PM Post #4471680
|
You could have many years of misery if that had backfired. |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
January 31, 2008
5:14 PM Post #4479537
|
Rosie what a great story.
Tir, tell me about it with the crumbs, do they need glasses??? Can't you see them? Esp in the am and there are crumbs from the bagel, in the microwave where it was defrosted, then where it was cut, then where it was smeared with cream cheese. Ever hear of a plate??? We have paper ones! Sheesh! |
debilu
Fingerlakes Region, NY
(Zone 6a)
January 31, 2008
5:19 PM Post #4479555
|
More than the crumbs on the counter bug me about no plate - I often see people set food down on their desks at work with no plate or napkin, and often when I come into work in the morning, the cleaning crew has left the garbage can on top of my desk - another thing I hate! |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
February 4, 2008
8:56 PM Post #4496344
|
ICK!!!!!!!!!!! |
crimsontsavo
Crossville, TN
(Zone 7a)
February 6, 2008
1:52 AM Post #4501364
|
I hate organizing my husbands clothes and it taking me the better part of an hour, then him coming in and destroying it all in seconds. :|
Or vacuuming 6 times a day only to have it look like a barn floor in five minutes.
LOL |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
February 6, 2008
3:11 PM Post #4503374
|
Love the I-robot commercial with the lady describing her 2 little pigs and her husband the "donkey". That's my house!! |
crimsontsavo
Crossville, TN
(Zone 7a)
February 8, 2008
11:51 PM Post #4514407
|
That thing really work?? If it does I'll save up to buy one LOL. Course the baby may find it fun to flip over and beat on. :-O |
mgpaquin
Savannah, GA
March 21, 2008
6:43 PM Post #4692401
|
Why does he INSIST on cutting tomatoes or cucumbers, etc., on the counter instead of using a cutting board? Why won't he EVER close a kitchen drawer or cabinet? Why can't he put pepper on something without covering the ENTIRE counter? Does he HAVE to leave the mayonnaise-covered spreader on the counter? Doesn't he SEE that he dropped that piece of garbage NEXT TO the garbage can and not IN the garbage can?
There. Now I feel better! (Oh, and even with all of those gripes above I'd rather have him around than not!) |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
March 21, 2008
7:54 PM Post #4692654
|
Hi!
It sounds like if you could just get rid of the KITCHEN all would be well!
Great post - gave me a laugh for the day. |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
March 21, 2008
10:25 PM Post #4693359
|
Mg, I have to laugh. I could have written your post. Hubby cuts on the counter
though we have several boards in different sizes.
The salt is the issue in our house. The sink is what, two feet away, yet he
salts things over the counter top. The knife is always left on the counter,
and he has never been able to make anything with onions without leaving a
peel on the floor next to the trash can.
And yes, I agree, I'd rather have him here than not, but some days I simply
don't get him. Obviously the kitchen is clean. Let's leave it as we found it,
eh, hubs?
LOL.
KM |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
March 22, 2008
9:39 AM Post #4694546
|
Okay, so why is that I am the only one who understands what a dishwasher is for? How is it that my kids have lived in this house with us for 6 years (the entire time we have lived in this house) and when they empty the dishwasher, there are so many items that they "don't know where it goes"? Why is it that children of at least average intelligence can't figure out how to correctly tie the bread bag or put the cereal back in the pantry??
Good to have that off my chest... |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
March 22, 2008
1:09 PM Post #4695277
|
LOL Shug,
Or how about when hubby does wash dishes, he puts things
back where they do not belong. The coffee cups have been in the
same cupboard for HOW many years?
;-) |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
March 22, 2008
5:56 PM Post #4696125
|
or how come 'knives down and spoons forks up' doesn't stick.
or -- P L E A S E shut off the light when you leave the room. |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
March 23, 2008
3:12 PM Post #4699535
|
I also hate to hear "Oh, I didn't know you had anything planted there..."
Or, "Is this anything? I think I might have mowed it..." "Why do you have to plant it where I have to mow?"
Or, "Why is everything you plant so random..why can't you plant in nice straight lines?" "Why can't all your flowers be the same height?
Or, "What do you mean..CURVE the walkway??" What's wrong with straight lines?" "BRICKS are straight edged Dorothy," "You can't curve a brick!" "I am not a miracle worker."
Of course to be fair... I know he hates to hear "No...I don't know what could have happened to that section of your lawn...strange it looks so evenly dead..." |
mgpaquin
Savannah, GA
March 24, 2008
9:32 PM Post #4705480
|
Oh, Shuggins, don't get me started on loading the dishwasher! And Wuvie, I've just learned to look in the "I don't know where it goes" section of the counter, or if it's not there I simply look EVERYWHERE. If I were a psychologist I could probably write a fascinating book about why men put things in the drawers/cabinets that they do... Then I'd get rich and be able to stay at home and put away the dishes myself... Ah, dreams! |
debilu
Fingerlakes Region, NY
(Zone 6a)
March 24, 2008
9:34 PM Post #4705499
|
DH doesn't know where half of the dishes go, but as long as he empties and loads/runs the dishwasher, I'm happy! I'll put away the few things he leaves on the counter. He vacuums too, so I'll keep him!! |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
March 25, 2008
9:38 AM Post #4707125
|
I always think it is funny that we give our DH's credit for everything they do. I'm not being critical because I do it too, but I don't think I get brownie points for doing all the laundry and all of the other things that get done with the exception of the couple of things that he and the boys are made to do.
As far as not knowing where things go, none of them ever seem to have a problem finding things when they are looking for dishes to dirty, just when it comes time to put away the clean ones. |
ves522
Jim Falls, WI
(Zone 4a)
March 25, 2008
11:49 AM Post #4707726
|
Selective memory! |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
March 25, 2008
8:58 PM Post #4709655
|
LOL Shug,
Much like my father. He has to announce that he took the trash out,
or makes statements to my mother like "I washed the windows for you,"
For you? For me? Those are MY windows?
If due a 'thank you' for every little ditty, women have a very long line of
them coming. LOL.
Wouldn't they think it was odd if we made an announcement after each chore?
"Honey, I washed your socks today."
"Dear, I did the dishes and made dinner."
Or how about "I paid bills, mopped the kitchen floor, went grocery shopping,
took the dog to the vet, cleaned the kitchen, emptied the dishwasher, fed the
cats, took a load to the recycling center, straightened the cupboard and..."
|
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
March 28, 2008
11:58 AM Post #4721583
|
Too funny, too true! |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
March 31, 2008
10:01 PM Post #4738092
|
Yep, hubby just announced "see I'm helping" as he brings the laundry bag down the stairs. Ohhhh whoppee! |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
March 31, 2008
10:08 PM Post #4738129
|
Well, did you do something nice for him since he helped "YOU" with the laundry? LOL! |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
April 2, 2008
5:22 PM Post #4747235
|
No more than I normally do cooking, cleaning, changing diapers. |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
April 2, 2008
9:08 PM Post #4748356
|
Well, that's certainly no way to show your appreciation!! LOL! |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
April 2, 2008
9:28 PM Post #4748462
|
D'ya ever feel like leaving a dirty diaper under his pillow??? or maybe in his sock drawer? |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
April 2, 2008
9:29 PM Post #4748470
|
Why is it when you're sick they leave everything for you to do after you get better? |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
April 3, 2008
8:38 AM Post #4749994
|
flowerjen...I just got the visual of my DH opening his sock drawer to find that special present. It would be too funny to see the look on his face, right before his head exploded!! LOL!
As far as leaving things when you are sick, obviously, you missed the memo stating that you are never allowed to be sick or in a bad mood or not feel like doing all your usual activities. I think it is in the contract. Of course, this is the contract that I don't remember signing and certainly never got a copy of, UNLESS it is in the fine print on the marriage license!! Gotat run check...Now what did I do with that marriage license!???? |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
April 3, 2008
8:31 PM Post #4753248
|
Shug!!! Your comment brought back a memory that I had long forgotten!!!! "NOW WHAT DID I DO WITH THAT MARRIAGE LICENSE!????" Early on in my marriage...after one heck of a fight... I got so upset and disgusted that I tore up my marriage license. To show the new hubby that I meant business, I (with great satisfaction) tossed the scraps into the kitchen garbage pail. My then new husband said (with a smug look on his face) "Yeah, well you think you've made a point...but I know you... you'll soon be going through the garbage and taping that license back up." Well, that comment really got me going...so to PROVE to him that I meant business...I opened a can of Campbells Chicken Noodle Soup (our #1 supper choice those days) and poured it over the paper scraps and stirred it up real good. I had forgotten all about that entire incident. (PS ...it was a real messy affair -- wiping those little noodles off of those tiny scraps, drying the paper bits and taping that entire mess back together. Today, that little license resides safe and sound in our safe. I may frame it and give it to my husband for our 36th anniversary!! Thanks for the memories! |
debilu
Fingerlakes Region, NY
(Zone 6a)
April 3, 2008
9:06 PM Post #4753434
|
funny! |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
April 4, 2008
8:44 PM Post #4758712
|
Too funny! |
threegardeners
North Augusta, ON
(Zone 5a)
April 5, 2008
9:29 AM Post #4760769
|
I wish he'd stop banging on the bathroom door and yelling at me when I'm in there.
a) How was I supposed to know he had to go?
b) Can't he hold it for like 2 minutes??
c) He's lived here for 5 years now, he should know THIS HOUSE HAS 2 BATHROOMS!!!! |
MistyPetals
North Augusta, SC
April 6, 2008
11:04 PM Post #4769062
|
I'm posting to leave some get-back-at-him things I've done to relieve the stress.
I cannot understand why he always forgets to bring a stack of newspaper home for the dog to do his business sooo, when he brings home the paper, I make sure to use the Sports section for the dog first, followed by the car section. (LOL)
Yes, I know, I'm bad. Ahhh, but its fun to listen to the question that always follows,
Why do you use the sports and cars sections first with the dog?
My response is always, I dunno. (LOL)
|
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
April 6, 2008
11:47 PM Post #4769261
|
You should tell him that lots of guys like to read while they do their business and you just are choosing the topics most likely to be of interest to the little guy.
This message was edited Apr 9, 2008 7:50 PM |
MistyPetals
North Augusta, SC
April 9, 2008
2:14 AM Post #4780071
|
LOL, MR |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
April 9, 2008
7:51 PM Post #4783922
|
either you laugh or you cry.. |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
April 17, 2008
10:57 PM Post #4825231
|
Or cry while you are laughing because you are mad at him for doing
something sweet to make up for the stupid thing he did the day before.
LOL |
beachbum757
Portsmouth, VA
April 24, 2008
8:49 AM Post #4856452
|
HA! I'm a newby here! I am so stoked at this forum! Sometimes you just gotta blow off steam so you don't blow it off on your loved ones. I know we will miss our family members when they have grown up and moved on or passed but we still have many frustrations as homemakers/ mothers etc.
I need some creative advice or stories of what others have done or hey maybe just some wisdom..
I am on the point of kicking to the curb my 23 yr old son. Housing costs what they are I would like him to be able to find something affordable for his income [a big joke today] and not have to come back when he does get his own place.
But here's my problem. He needs to pitch in more while he is here!
He will let the trash/ grass and his stuff get too high unless I nag him to death. I'm over it! Many of my friends say that this is typical but that doesn't help. He pays some rent but not enough to cover his portion of housing costs and he works long hours.
I'm worried if I charge too much he will never be able to move out.
He has excellent credit and has always paid his own bills. {car, insurance, phone and medical]}
For example: He says he empties his trash [his bedroom can] so why should he have to empty mine. {pulling hair}
I am divorced and he wants the position of man of the house, without the responsibility.
When he was younger he did much better at pitching in.
Now my daughter is starting to follow in his footsteps and they both say, well he didn't help, she doesn't do as much as me, etc.
I have told them both it is not their place to worry about what others are doing [I will handle that] but that as young adults they need to help with our large home and yard or get their own place. I gave my son until January 2009 to find somewhere because I'm tired of fighting. I'm not sure he sees how serious I am.
It's like having 2 husbands! HeHe! |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
April 24, 2008
11:31 AM Post #4857256
|
I charged my son the full price - I thought about reducing the charge so he could save to move out ----but I really didn't feel comfortable that he would save it, and didn't feel comfortable asking about his savings. SO ---- I charged the rent I thought he would have to pay in 'the real world' ...and I saved in an account the part over and above what would be a reduced rent price. He had a deadline to go and when he did -- he got the extra bucks. (One year after college graduation.) He understood that when he left the money was his - I told him exactly how much would be saved and how much would be real rent.. and so there was no 'but if I pay you THAT MUCH I won't be able to save enough to move moooooooommm!" I also told him that if he wasn't ready at the deadline...the money was forefitted and in 6 months after that deadline the locks would be changed. He had to leave. We have a really good relationship and mostly see eye to eye.. it didn't strain the relationship any. Truly he wanted out and independence as bad as I wanted him out. He understood that he needed to go because his rules/ways didn't mesh well with mine and it WAS MY HOUSE AFTERALL. (SMILE) As Tina says "whats love got to do with it?"
The chores weren't as formalized. Except that I did nothing for him. If he didn't do his laundry...he didn't have anything to wear..if he left the laundry in the washer wet or the dryer dry...I dumped them in a basket and left them right there..wet dry or wrinkled. He did use my supplies, soap, cleaning stuff etc. I made it clear that we had to have a working society and each of us had to contribute to the welfare of the society..and that meant getting the chores done. I considered billing him if I had t do a chore for him --but I never did -even with slip ups. What I had to LEARN was that his time schedule and mine may be different. I wanted the trash out every night and for him it may be every 3 days. I wanted the laundry out of the dryer -when it dried. For him that may be the next day. So I compromised on that. I don't think we had a trash issue (mine or his) but I would not have expected him to harvest mine from my bedroom ..it would be deposited by me in the main container to be taken out. I hope I would have only had to say once that 'you do things for me (like take out my trash) because I do things for you - like have milk in the fridge - we don't tit for tat here. We have to make this thing work and that means we do things for each other. |
flowerjen
central, NJ
(Zone 6b)
April 24, 2008
3:07 PM Post #4858393
|
missingrosie-love your ideas, I'm not anywhere near that... my son is 5 and daughter is 20 months but I love hearing what everyone does in that situation. |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
April 24, 2008
10:36 PM Post #4860492
|
Well glad to help FlowerJ (smile) When my kids were 5 --even 10 years old, am quite sure that I wouldn't have been as creative. For me it was 'do it because I told you to do it.' Thankfully, wisdom does come with age (and a LOT of boo boos.) I think the most freeing thing for me was to come to the realization that I could do / say / implement things that were not very popular, got my kids pretty mad at me, and yet still retain my status as an OK mom. The old saying that parents repeat to their kids is true "YOU WILL THANK ME FOR THIS LATER" |
WUVIE
Hulbert, OK
(Zone 7a)
April 24, 2008
11:31 PM Post #4860730
|
Oh my.
My oldest son, who is now 22, was a real turd when living at home.
That is putting it mildly. The kid could bring out a side of me I never
knew I had, but brush me off as though I were nothing. Everything
has changed since then.
Nag, nag, nag, and then one day, out of the blue, he announced that
he was moving out. Never in a million years did I think he was serious.
I asked him if it was that bad, and he laughed and said that in all honesty,
it all just fell in place at the same time I was being a total nag. Good thing,
because he was about to find his crap on the lawn. Boys. Whew!
He moved in with three other kids (well, they are grown, but they are
still kids to me) and things have worked just fine. Two guys, two girls,
all separate bedrooms renting a big house together. They all have different
shifts and jobs, but it works quite well, and I love the fact that one of them
is a police officer.
He and I get along just dreamy now. That is, of course, an abbreviated
version of the story, but true. He's been out of the house for, oh, I think over
a year and some now.
:-)
Corrected typo in edit
This message was edited Apr 27, 2008 7:58 PM |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
April 25, 2008
8:03 AM Post #4861477
|
I always find it interesting because people whose children are grown are always saying that you should cherish these moments, they grow up so fast, etc. Okay, so I am not saying that that isn't true, but I have a 12 year old, 11 year old, and 18 month old (all boys, no less) and some days I can tell you how many hours it is until they are all 18 years old... I'm sure that I will miss them when they are gone, but for now some days, I just miss them as much as possible!! LOL! |
missingrosie
Hillsborough, NC
April 25, 2008
10:42 AM Post #4862146
|
Shug - I never had a 'cherish these moments' epiphany. I suspect that is the case with most parents. Some days it was just one foot in front of the other and that was good because it meant I was standing and they hadn't brought me to my knees yet. |
shuggins
Houston, TX
(Zone 9b)
April 25, 2008
10:55 AM Post #4862206
|
missingrosie...Amen!! If they get you down then it is easier for them to overtake you!! |
beachbum757
Portsmouth, VA
April 25, 2008
2:57 PM Post #4863198
|
Yep, I think the rent needs to go up as well as the nagging. I had hoped that because they are supposedly adults now, the nagging could stop.
It's funny I have 2 older boys who moved out as soon as they could, no problem. My daughter inlaw tells my youngest son he has a mommy attachment disorder because he would be fine staying home. HeHe!
My daughter who is soon to be 20 moved out and 10 miles away for 9 months to take a job in a real estate law firm. Due to the housing market slowing she was laid off and came back home, but she is wanting to move as soon as she is able again and has been working towards that.
By the way when my 23 year old says he shouldn't have to take out my trash, I meant the kitchen, general trash can. He throws his trash in there along with everyone else. I take the small trash bag from my room, living room and bathroom and tie them up into one bag sometimes I take that out but he should to sometimes.
I am disabled and take care of most of the yard and house. He can do more and I will just have to put my foot down...
We had a good relationship until he hit over 21.
Thanks for all the chat and I would be happy to hear more! |
