I'm sorry to say Big Red passed away not too long ago.
For those looking for me I decided to post that my parents health (esp my mother's) has deteriorated dramatically this past year. I can't say when I'll be back online but did want to thank Erynne for the seeds she sent (I'm sorry this is so late) and to others for the emails I have unfortunately not replied too.
It is so tough when those whom you love get into the tough health issues, my thoughts are with you.
I hope you get some time in your garden to renew your strength and that your Mom's troubles lift with time.
Thank you everyone for your concern and condolences. Mom put up an incredible fight but her passing was truly a blessing...there comes a point where one thinks how much more can a human take? Death, in her case, erased the pain and the ravages of poor health.
Growing up I was constantly amazed by her incredible dancing talent . When she left her parents' home she moved to Winnipeg where she taught dance at Arthur Murray's Dance Academy, and she was very proud to be Gordon Pinsent's http://www.northernstars.ca/actorspqr/pinsentbio.html dance partner on occasion. For many years she was very coordinated and flexible but the effects of the physical demands of dancing, especially in her youth, on her joints (and it was probably worsened since she had double joints) gave her arthritis that eventually robbed her of the ability to walk, lift her arms, or even move her fingers. Prior to that a surgery on her knees (re arthritis) caused a stroke that resulted in memory robbing dementia. Eventually she even lost the ability to swallow and talk. May she rest in peace.
This is one of the few pictures we have of Mom (most were lost in their house fire). I prefer to remember her looking like this.
Thanks Sandy...I must admit my posting above had me pause prior to hitting send (I'm sure I'll be editing it soon.) and having a healthy picture of Mom to post was important to me. I had one person get quite angry at me for saying death would be a kindness to Mom when she asked how Mom was doing and I don't think I'm quite over that.
Thanks Glenda. All is going much smoother now...Dad looked very ill at the funeral which had people telling me I'd better keep a very close eye on him. It turns out he had taken some Pepto Bismo prior to Mom's memorial service (which reacted with the warfarin (Coumadin) that he's taking). He had us very worried for a number of days but plenty of yogurt and water cleared his system. Again probably more than people want to know but if your on warfarin avoiding Pepto Bismo could save you from a bad case of internal bleeding (thankfully Dad decided to check the instructions as soon as he got home from the service).
Pam, I'm glad you mention the reaction pepto with warfarin cause, I'm on warfarin. So many over the counter medication has to be checked, before we take it. Glad your Dad is feeling better. I understand what you meant about how your Mom's death would be a blessing for her. Not that we wish their death, in any way, but the relief from the suffering, they have to endure till death. Now she is resting peacefully. I'm sure you will need some time to readjust to things now and take care of yourself. Hope everything goes well for you, and your family.
Lovely photo of your Mom, she looks like a star.
Thank you Burn...I truly feel that quality of life is important and she was certainly lacking any hope of that returning. Dementia does allow some lucid moments and that was a very, very difficult time for Mom.
re the warfarin Dad never dreamed that a product they have always had in the medicine cabinet could be so dangerous (but he now is checking any/every medicine for possible interactions).
Thank you everyone for you kind comments re Mom's looks. Grief has different stages and I must admit I find my memories of her in my early childhood the most comforting. My strongest memories is of Mom having the radio turned to CBC and when they played music from the big bands she would dance (their living room didn't have carpets then). To my young eyes she danced as well as those on T.V. (40 years later her talent still amazed me).
Sandy I too never thought of Gordon Pincent being a dancer. ;) Mom however said he was the star of the Academy.
Peace and Pain free is a good wish for any loved one, don't let anyone tell you different!
I am very sorry to hear that your Mom was in so much pain prior to her passing, that would be so hard for all of her family to see.
I agree that she looks like a movie star!
Thanks for the warning on the pepto, I didn't have a clue about that one.
Take care of yourself.
Pam, I'm afraid that I've not gotten much beyond the gnomes adventures of late on this Forum and I'm sorry that I didn't check in sooner.
Having experienced the slow decline of my mother whose mind and all functions ceased a couple of years before her body quit, I know exactly what you mean when you say the final passing was a blessed event and I hope you don't have to argue it with anyone else.
I'm really happy that you have a few pictures of your mother because looking back on happier times through pictures can do a lot to ease the more recent tortured memories. It certainly was therapeutic for me. She obviously was a very talented person and I hope that your memories will triumph over the pain you feel at her loss.
Hi Pam, I'm so very sorry to read about the death of your mother. I had not heard besides that she was failing. Mom's hold such a special place in our hearts. I so remember praying for an end to the suffering with my Mom too. It's so very difficult to see someone you love so dearly endure the pain. Hugs and sympathy to you. (((Pam)))
Thank you everyone...again I've been lax at replying to threads/emails. To bring you up to date while Dad looked pretty gray at Mom's funeral he picked up, albeit at a slower pace, after. However not too long after Mom's funeral Dad was given the news that the cancer doc had done all she could as he refused chemo. In the end though Dad, who stubbornly continued to go out in the winter in a fragile state, fell a week and a half ago and passed away Feb 25.
Thank you for your previous kindness everyone and please keep my brother and myself in your thoughts and prayers though the next couple of weeks.
Thank you everyone so much...your messages here mean so much to me. It's been/is pretty overwhelming but we are looking at this one day at a time (I'm so thankful that we have good people helping us).
We had the viewing last night and will be discussing the burial arrangements soon (Dad wanted to be cremated). It was a very comforting viewing as friends and members of the local Lion's Club came. Dad was a 54 year member and these fellows were a huge part of his life.
Not sure when the burial will be, it could be soon but we have also though of spring. Dad loved gardening, working with the warm soil and I personally have thought that might be the perfect time (but am open to whatever my brother wants).
I love you Pam and am sorry for all of your losses. I lost my day last year and it made the world change. There was nobody to call on the phone who cared and who would make it better. I know how your world has changed. I hope you look to the moments in you life and reflect the positive moments. Your friend Steve.
Hi Pam- I am so sorry to hear that you lost your Mom and Dad . Having been through losing 2- my Mom and my baby sister within 2.5 months just 2 years ago , I know that you are feeling devestated and probably numb to the point of not knowing from one moment to the next what to feel or think. Please believe me, it will wear off and the empty feeling will ease also. Always remember the good times, and know that the pain and suffering is done . They are both young and whole together again . My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Thank you everyone so much for your words of sympathy!
I really couldn't come back to this thread for a long time. It was a tough winter, I ended up in the hospital swollen up to twice my normal size (freak allergy reaction) and with an extreme defiency of potassium.
We love you Pam and are glad some of the tough things are getting a little better. Hey maybe you need to get a hobby like gardening! LOL
This is a collage of my back yard this am. I am sending it to you.
ah thank you ((((Sofer)))) and I'm LOLOL over "hobby like gardening! LOL"
Truth be told I had a really, really hard time visiting the greenhouses this year (my parents took me with them to the greenhouses every year whilst growing up). The memories hit hard in the beginning but after awhile I came to cherish the love they gave me of this hobby.
I'll prolly post some of my garden pics, in another thread, later on.