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Article: Confessions of a Coffee-aholic: Great article!

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Forum: Article: Confessions of a Coffee-aholicReplies: 6, Views: 63
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Fredericksburg, VA
(Zone 7b)

February 15, 2008
3:20 PM

Post #4541635

Wonderful stuff, from another coffee drinker! I do remember the perk on the stove kind. LOL Good job and very interesting. Had no idea on their growth habits, thanks for sharing.
Menasha, WI
(Zone 5a)

February 15, 2008
5:38 PM

Post #4542305

Nice one Lee Anne.

Reminds me of one of my favorite Monty Python Flying Circus sketches - Just replace sherry with coffee,glasses with cups and bottles with pots.

Couldn't find the video - this is the sceenplay
( The next sketch starts after some silly noises.)

Black screen and a collection of really silly noises. Then fade up on a country church. Cut to interior, a vestry. A sign reads 'No Papists'. The door opens and the vicar enters as if from the end of a service. He takes off his cassock and is hanging it up. At one side of the set is a sculpture on a plinth. It is the vicar's head, but with an enormously long nose. Mr Kirkham has followed the vicar in. He is an earnest, quiet, self-effacing soul, with a tortured conscience.
Vicar : Come in.
Kirkham : I wondered if I could have a word with you for a moment.
Vicar: By all means ... by all means, sir. Do sit down. (they look round for a chair) Ah, sit on the desk here.
Kirkham: Thank you.
Vicar: Now then, a glass of sherry?
Kirkham: No... no thank you...
Vicar: (getting a bottle from the cupboard) Are you sure? I'm going to have some.
Kirkham: Well, if you're having some, yes then, perhaps, vicar.
Vicar (slightly taken aback): Oh... well there's only just enough for me.
Kirkham: Well in that case I won't, don't worry.
Vicar: You see, if I split what's left, there'd be hardly any left for me at all.
Kirkham: Well, I'm not a great sherry drinker.
Vicar: Good! So, I can have it all ... now then what's the problem?
Kirkham: Well, just recently I've begun to worry about...
The vicar has been looking through his desk. He produces a bottle of sherry in triumph.
Vicar: Ah! I've found another bottle! You can have some now if you want to.
Kirkham: Well... yes, perhaps a little...
Vicar : Oh you don't have to. I can drink the whole bottle.
Kirkham: Well in that case, no...
Vicar: Good! That's another bottle for me. Do go on.
The vicar opens the bottle and pours himself a glass. As soon as he has drunk it he replenishes it again.
Kirkham: I've begun to worry recently that...
There is a knock on the door.
Vicar: Come in!
A smooth man, Mr Husband, enters carrying a smart little briefcase.
Vicar : Ah, Mr Husband ... this is Mr Kirkham, one of my parishioners, this is Mr Husband of the British Sherry Corporation...
Kirkham Look, look, perhaps I'd better come back later...
Vicar: No, no ... no do stay here. Have a sherry... you won't be long will you, Husband?
Husband: Oh no, vicar... it's just a question of signing a few forms.
The vicar pours Husband a sherry.
Vicar : There we are... there we are, Mr Husband. Now, how about you, Mr Kirkham?
Kirkham: Well only if there's enough.
Vicar: Oh well, there's not much now.
Kirkham : Oh, in that case... no... I won't bother.
Vicar: (pouring himself one) Good. Right... now, then, what is the problem, Husband?
Husband : Well, vicar, I've made enquiries with our shippers and the most sherry they can ship in any one load is 12,000 gallons.
Vicar: And how many glasses is that?
Husband : That's roughly 540,000 glasses, Vicar.
Vicar: That's excellent, Husband, excellent.
Husband : Yes... it means you can still keep your main sherry supply on the roof, but you can have an emergency supply underneath the vestry of 5,000 gallons.
Vicar: Yes... and I could have dry sherry on the roof and Amontillado in the underground tank!
Husband: Absolutely.
The vicar signs a form that Husband hands to him.
Vicar: Excellent work, Husband, excellent work.
Husband: Not at all, vicar, you're one of our best customers... you and the United States. Well goodbye. (he leaves)
Flora, IN
(Zone 5a)

February 15, 2008
5:39 PM

Post #4542309

Thanks for the article, Now I have to find a coffee plant for my son. He is the coffee connoisseur in our house. He has even made his own roaster for the green beans he gets over the net.
North Augusta, ON

February 15, 2008
5:44 PM

Post #4542323

LOL Al...that is a funny one!!!

I am so glad to hear I'm not the only coffee-aholic out there, and that you all like the article.
Los Alamos, NM
(Zone 5a)

February 15, 2008
7:44 PM

Post #4542866

Recently, I had a colonoscopy and was surprised when the doctor told me the number of years it would be before my next exam. I asked him why the number had changed. He said , "Well last time you were here we thought coffee would kill you, this time we think it prevents colon cancer. Things change!"

I am really glad to hear how good coffee is for you. I never gave it up. Oh, and I can drink it at bed time and sleep like a baby, but it isn't much help when I try to use it to stay awake for long cross-country drives. Cold water keeps me awake better.


Leesburg, FL
(Zone 9b)

February 15, 2008
10:54 PM

Post #4543598

'nother java-junkie here... great article!!
Columbus, OH
(Zone 6a)

February 18, 2008
3:58 PM

Post #4555191

Mmmm...Monty Python AND doesn't get much better than that!
My DH and I really love our programmable coffeepot, it's our first, too. And we are both seriously addicted to those flavored creamers: Cinnamon Vanilla, French Vanilla, Caramel Chocolate...oh yeah!
Great article! It's a nice looking plant, who knew?

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Other Article: Confessions of a Coffee-aholic Threads you might be interested in:

SubjectThread StarterRepliesLast Post
Nice article pbtxlady 36 Mar 14, 2010 4:00 PM
Great article LavinaMae 0 Feb 15, 2008 11:37 PM
coffee-yuck momsey 0 Feb 18, 2008 3:06 PM
What timing! JuneyBug 0 Mar 3, 2010 4:48 AM
A French Roast toast Caedi25 1 Mar 5, 2010 3:33 PM

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