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Article: My Dear Dead Houseplants.: ROFLMAO

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Forum: Article: My Dear Dead Houseplants.Replies: 8, Views: 65
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doccat5
Fredericksburg, VA
(Zone 7b)

February 18, 2008
01:35 AM

Post #4553744

What a hoot, I love your article and can certainly relate. Although I usually use plain old water to kill mine, the coffee grinds are too valuable for my compost bin!

Thanks for sharing. :)
Dutchlady1
Naples, FL
(Zone 10a)

February 18, 2008
08:07 AM

Post #4554307

Very funny!
MitchF
Lindsay, OK
(Zone 7a)

February 18, 2008
08:30 AM

Post #4554356

Wonderful article, keep them coming!
knottthemama
Duncan, OK

February 18, 2008
09:44 AM

Post #4554564

You may just be trying too hard. That's what my kids tell me about the fact that if I baby-sit, the baby and I will both have diaper rash in 30 minutes. My house plant, the same variety as yours and I have a years-long understanding. It thrives on benign neglect, as do I. I once had a kitchen that was 12'x24'. I placed my plant on a shelf against the winowless wall. When it started hanging down too much I put up a cup hook to support it. In 3 years we (the plant and I) had covered the ceiling and 3 walls of my kitchen. When I had to paint, my step-son and my DH simply waited until I was out, and pulled it all down and murdered it. Broke my heart. Made my plant mad at me too, and no other like it would survive in my care for years. When my son was 40, he finally told me that my plant used to hang down in the doorway of his bedroom and give him nightmares. My plant and I are back to normal now. My whole house is only 24' long now, and that whole wall is covered with my plant. We are one. We are happy. His name is Clyde. I give him about a half gallon of water every 2 weeks or so, and he gives me unlimited pleasure.
mypondview
Newcastle, Ontario
Canada

February 18, 2008
10:00 AM

Post #4554640

Oh boy ! I can relate. But, I moved into a new house that is so light and bright that I hope to turn over a new leaf.(sorry about that.)
I was given a gorgeous Bromeliad as a house-warming gift at the beginning of September and it still has a proud but faded magnificent flower. It also has produced a pup which I intend to sever. I have become such a fan of this species that I plan to begin a modest collection. Question. Do bromeliads take a specific type of potting soil? I can't seem to find a definitive answer.
katsu
Columbus, OH
(Zone 6a)

February 18, 2008
10:26 AM

Post #4554740

Hilarious article!

I too feel regret over the many, many houseplants that have been cruelly slaughtered by the vicious cycle of abuse and neglect that I call "keeping houseplants".

It's gotten to the point that now, when I'm in a store, considering the purchase of one of these poor souls, I fix them with a steely stare and warn them, harshly, of their possible fate in my hands. If they appear to shrink back or wither slightly, or shiver as though from an unseen breeze, I give a hollow laugh and pass on. If they should simply stare back in a challenging manner, then I feel they may possibly be hardy enough to attempt to survive in my den of houseplant horror, and I make my purchase before the brave plant can change its mind.

I wonder why people look at me funny at the plant store...?
: )
starlight1153
Seale, AL
(Zone 8b)

February 18, 2008
01:23 PM

Post #4555554

Charming article.!!!!!! Maybe that is what we all need to do, put little blue signs up with will work for water on them. Mayeb they wouldn't be forgotten as much.

Sorry ya lost the love of yoru life there, but hopefully soon another sweet thign wil catch your eye, wave its leaves and say take me home.

Thanks for the story and smiles!
bjf826
(Barb) Quincy, FL
(Zone 8b)

February 18, 2008
04:35 PM

Post #4556422

Your article make me laugh... thanks!

Barb
Aunt_A
Tulsa, OK

February 19, 2008
02:54 AM

Post #4558646

Thanks for all the kind words! Glad you enjoyed the article...I loved writing it.

MyPondView: I'm not sure about Bromeliads.


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Other Article: My Dear Dead Houseplants. Threads you might be interested in:

SubjectThread StarterRepliesLast Post
Fun article! crashbandiscoot 1 Feb 19, 2008 2:56 AM
Oh! How Delightful! HORSEWOMAN3D 2 Feb 19, 2008 8:25 AM
The worst plant killer ever MotherDragon 2 Feb 19, 2008 7:31 PM
Got Coffee? 1AnjL 1 Feb 19, 2008 3:01 AM
Timely message! pamsaplantin 1 Feb 19, 2008 3:02 AM


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