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‘Tis the season for pretty gift boxes promising Amaryllis for growing indoors. This time of year, boxes of bulb kits line the shelves of upscale nurseries and big box stores, sometimes even grocery checkout lanes. For a mere $4.99, $9.99 or $14.99, depending on store, location, but largely upon beauty of the box, they offer springtime anytime. Of course, you may only get half what you pay for, and the box tells half the story.
Many years ago, I received my first Amaryllis as a Christmas gift from a landlady. I thought the gift was odd, especially considering there was a lovely flower pictured on the box and only an ugly white plastic pot inside. Since then I have come to think landlords who give Christmas gifts are odd. She must have been a rare, unappreciated breed, as I’ve never received a Christmas gift from a landlord or landlady since.
I had never heard of nor seen an Amaryllis. I took the ugly white plastic pot out of the box, and it sat on the kitchen table with the rest of the clutter. I watered immediately, as the box instructions said to do, and promptly forgot it. As was my nature, the clutter accumulated unforgotten around the mysterious pot. I didn’t even pay much attention when it sprouted. After all, everyone knows that a sprout is a long ways from the picture on the box.
But one day I came home from classes and the sprout was over a foot tall. I could swear it wasn’t the day before. I searched frantically for the instructions, but they weren’t among the clutter. I watered frantically. If I forgot to water and ignored it and it still grew a foot, what did I have? I was blessed with a lovely orangish pale-stemmed blossom. Nothing so elegant would dine on human blood, so my visions of Little Shop of Horrors were placated.
Twenty years later I got an Amaryllis in a box from my sister for my birthday. I was certain it would go better this time. I’m a gardener now, after all. I can grow anything. I’d even learned that Amaryllis is a bulb, and that its real name is Hippeastrum. I know what a genus, a species, and a cultivar are. I’ve seen Plant Files where entering Amaryllis as the genus nets you 12 hits but the genus Hippeastrum has 12 pages. And I have a Red Lion.
I kept the instructions this time. I tended my Red Lion with the faith of Mother Teresa. I even d-mailed a DG friend who gave me instructions on how to keep Red Lion alive past blooming in my Zone 5, and get him to bloom next year. I followed the instructions on the box to the letter, except that I threw out the fake dirt it came with in favor of the heavier potting soil suggested by my friend. Sometimes the ugly plastic pot doesn’t even have holes in the bottom and must be replaced in favor of one that does. I watered frequently when green began to show.
Red Lion bloomed ferociously as the picture above demonstrates. He was perfect on Christmas. He was a brilliant red, as his name suggested, earning his spot near the Christmas tree. I even propped up his flopping leaf onto the tree. When he finished blooming I admired his seed pods and let his stalk shrivel up. The instructions I had said it didn’t matter whether the stalk shriveled up or was cut off. I was cautioned, however, not to cut it off over the carpet, as there is a lot of moisture in that stalk. Red Lion was loved. For a while. But then I forgot him. And forgot following the instructions.
Sue’s instructions specifically stated to set my Hippeastrum outside during the day for hardening off when the weather got nice. I forgot. I was supposed to leave him outside all the time when the night temperatures stayed at least in the high 40’s. I didn’t. “Summer them in light shade,” said Sue, “so you don’t have to water so much.” I summered Red Lion on the kitchen counter dry as a bone. I was warned that the summer foliage might look a little ratty, but Red Lion had no new foliage at all. The instructions said to bring him in before it freezes and not to water until new growth started. Thirteen months after being surprised with pleasure in a box for my birthday, I found Red Lion behind the cookie jar dry, sad, and very much dead.
I’m not telling my sister or Sue about that, and this year I’ll do better, even though I’ll have to buy my own pleasure in a box.
For more exotic Hippeastrum bulbs, forget the kit. For the likes of Lemon and Lime you will purchase one bulb not found in any store, no matter how upscale, in the Midwest. Before I purchase an extraordinary and expensive Hippeastrum bulb, I need to keep a Red Lion alive. Red Lions are everywhere. Kits can include a bamboo box, reusable ceramic vase, or the ugly plastic pot, each reflected in the price. Mont Blanc, Apple Blossom, and Minerva can be found easily as well, and different parts of the U.S. have slightly different stock. While I wonder if the bamboo box has holes in the bottom, the rest of the world wonders if I can remember to follow instructions.
About Lori Geistlinger
Lori and her husband, Handsome Man, garden in the heart of Tornado Alley in the Midwest. She likes perennials, because if they don't come back, chances are she forgot she planted them and doesn't realize she killed them. Don't take her too seriously.
Posted by MitchF (from Oklahoma City, OK) on December 10, 2007 at 9:09 PM:
Love it - I have been there toooooo many times with these.
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Posted by McGlory (from Southeast, NE) on December 10, 2007 at 9:58 PM:
But this year will be different, right? I'm sure it will for me. LOL!
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Posted by KyWoods (from Melbourne, KY) on December 10, 2007 at 10:00 PM:
Oooo, I want one, I want one! LOL, love that last line about the rest of the world wondering if you know how to follow instructions!
Edit: I've never had one before, so wish me luck!
This message was edited Dec 10, 2007 9:01 PM
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Posted by MitchF (from Oklahoma City, OK) on December 10, 2007 at 10:36 PM:
I keep trying... and I keep killing them... oh well... but I try try try agian!
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Subject: Nice to know I'm not the only one
Posted by grampapa (from Wheatfield, NY) on December 10, 2007 at 1:52 AM:
Hi, Lori
Very nice article. Years ago I was gifted with an amaryllis which bloomed beautifully. I then let it dry out until it was dead as a doornail and threw it out. Last week I bought 2 of the boxed kits, no drainage holes in the pots. But I was in a hurry, so I potted them up exactly as the directions said. I will be careful not to overwater. What's my chances of following the rest of the instructions and getting them to last more than one bloom season? LOL
~ jan
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Posted by theflyingcrane (from Frisco, CO) on December 10, 2007 at 11:15 AM:
Over the years I have collected 6 amaryllis. I keep them in a south facing window year round. Water a bit weekly. They bloom every year, and most years they give 2 tall, blooming stalks at once.
I do not harden, I do not bury in closet or fridge for a few months. I do not pull from pots and trim roots. I do everything wrong: yet they continue to bloom. These are the cheap, Walmart varieties.....I pick up one or 2 after the holidays, the boxes are torn and the bulbs have often started sprouting.
Place in a nice pot with drain holes, nice potting soil and away they go. I have blossoms from December to April.
As with my bonsai: less is more. Don't over do anything and all will be happy.
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Posted by debilu (from Fingerlakes Region, NY) on December 10, 2007 at 12:34 PM:
Fun article Lori!
I set my pot of amaryllis in the basement, and forgot about it until late October. No water all summer. Brought it upstairs, added water, and have 2 sets of leaves, will have to wait to see if stalks and blooms follow...
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Posted by jjpm74 (from Stratford, CT) on December 10, 2007 at 12:59 PM:
Amaryllis bulbs will bloom for years if they are kept watered when they are not flowering. All that needs to be done to them is in the spring, when the weather gets warmer, take them outside or to your potting bench and gently remove them from their pots (this is easier to do if the soil is dry). Once that's done, gently remove any external dead foliage and repot with fresh soil. Bring them in or leave them inside and water regularly when they are not flowering. That's all there is to it, Red Lion does not need a hardening off time. I usually leave them in a shady area outside that will get water when I water my outside plants and cut off all older foliage when bringing them in in the fall.
Once you get more into them, there is a way to force them to bloom twice a year instead of once (though the bulb is then a goner as it expends all of its energy).
This message was edited Dec 10, 2007 12:00 PM
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Posted by cathy4 (from St. Louis County, MO) on December 10, 2007 at 3:21 PM:
Lori, I love your writing, always fun to read. C4
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Posted by victorgardener (from Lower Hudson Valley, NY) on December 10, 2007 at 5:20 PM:
Fun, Lori!
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Posted by Dea (from Frederick, MD) on December 10, 2007 at 6:39 PM:
I'm "one of those" also....hangs head in shame...I've killed a few :) I love your articles!!!
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Posted by McGlory (from Southeast, NE) on December 10, 2007 at 9:58 PM:
Thanks to those of you with instructions offering me confidence I won't slay the Lion this year. :-) And thank you to those who understand my loss. I don't feel quite so alone. Glad you liked the article.
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Posted by llilyfan (from South Central, IA) on December 11, 2007 at 2:57 AM:
So, You weren't going to tell me about the death? Just to make you feel better...I've done the same thing many times over the years. :>)
I set my hippies out on the porch which is mostly shaded when I first put them outside, otherwise their poor leaves just turn crispy.
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Posted by McGlory (from Southeast, NE) on December 11, 2007 at 11:23 AM:
Oh, sheesh! I've been had!
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Posted by Islandshari (from Kwajalein
(Marshall Islands)) on December 14, 2007 at 12:24 AM:
Once again Lori, you have given me grins and chuckles. Better luck this year with your lovely "pleasure in a box".
they weren’t among the clutter. I watered frantically. If I forgot to water and ignored it and it still grew a foot, what did I have? I was blessed with a lovely orangish pale-stemmed blossom. Nothing so elegant would dine on human blood, so my visions of Little Shop of Horrors were placated.
For more exotic Hippeastrum bulbs, forget the kit. For the likes of Lemon and Lime you will purchase one bulb not found in any store, no matter how upscale, in the Midwest. Before I purchase an extraordinary and expensive Hippeastrum bulb, I need to keep a Red Lion alive. Red Lions are everywhere. Kits can include a bamboo box, reusable ceramic vase, or the ugly plastic pot, each reflected in the price. Mont Blanc, Apple Blossom, and Minerva can be found easily as well, and different parts of the U.S. have slightly different stock. While I wonder if the bamboo box has holes in the bottom, the rest of the world wonders if I can remember to follow instructions. 
