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Accessible Gardening: #20 Practical Matters for Physically Challenged Gardeners, 1 by Agavegirl1

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In reply to: #20 Practical Matters for Physically Challenged Gardeners

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Agavegirl1 wrote:
Hi Good Morning :D

Always feel so guilty my posts are so long but I'm addressing 4 or 5 people where as you guys just get to address me. Besides it's fun to have people to talk to. :D

Thaaaaank God those staples came out yesterday. Funny thing is my MD hired a new NP. He had been the head floor nurse for my current Neurologist at A of U! Small world isn't it! Still waiting for goose egg and scabs (ewww) to go away before I can contend with coloring my ahem..."natural" silver highlights. Of course this happened right when I was due to color my hair not after I did it!

O.K. one of my favorite plants...because it doesn't die here in 118 degrees and actually thrives in the sun..the prickly pear! You mentione the Oputia gosseliana v.'Santa Rita'. Beautiful. I have one of those too in the front yard. Slow grower and small annoying little glochids :[ but gorgeous none the less and eye catching. Have you considered a Beaver Tail prickly? Great one! Obviously named due to resemblance of beaver tail shaped pads. Nice thing about it is it grows fast, no glochids, is relatively "friendly" in that it has spines but they're not overly wicked if you use leather gloves and it's flowers are amazing! Mine are still small but they've grown about 1/3rd bigger in just the 3 months I've had them. They have now topped the 1 foot mark. I haven't seen mine flower yet because they're too young but I know the flowers are absolutely spectacular on them!
I also have a Cow's Tongue prickly (Opuntia englemennii v. linguiformis ). Not exactly user friendly in that even though it has no glochids the spines on this thing are formidable! It grows pretty slow It does get both flowers and fruit that are just amazing and it is a huge clumper. Really a pretty plant once you get it planted!

Of course there's the one I showed you guys awhile ago about the size of a car with the beautiful fruit and smooth paddles. I didn't touch the paddles but I know the fruit definitely has a few glochids! Still a spectacular specimen if you can identify it.
I'd have to spend some time looking up all the ones you listed but I'm sure they're great. Anxious to see them. I'm always looking for something to put in the yard, especially anything that lives here and can take sun,heat and cold and not need to be babied and coddled!
I never used to appreciate them as much as the Agaves and Aloes but I'm starting to find they have their own particular sculptural beauty rather than flamboyant and bizarre style of Agaves and Aloes or the precise and exact regimented orderly style of Saguaros. Find a really cool article in our Plant Files by Geoff Stein (7/2/13) called Intro to Opuntias: THE Signature Cactus Genus. Great pictures, great plant ideas and very comprehensive on pests and diseases.

As for spiders well you have discovered my Achilles Heel. EWWWW! YUCK! Hate them! Kill, kill, kill !!! We don't get "spiders" we get black widows, brown recluse, tarantulas. Can we say heart attack! Black widows are very common especially in Summer. They're always looking for cool, dark places. Our old house that we had built was in a new subdivision. When we first moved in we killed 4 alone in the garage and about 6 in the back yard! So far only 1 hear and that was the neighbor's side. It had made a home around the water spigot. I didn't want it or it's offspring wandering onto my property! My husband killed it for me.
At night anywhere it is common practice to go out with a flash light and check for them in bushes, plants, corners. I do this regularly since I garden and have the hose out regularly. (They like damp areas too). The marking on their backs shows up almost white- blue and quite vividly in light. I've unloaded whole cans of Raid spider killer on them and wearing my leather gloves smashed them with a brick I keep handy screeching and stomping on them the whole time! DH isn't always around and with Zoe (dog) who utilizes the back yard regularly and has the curiosity of a cat and the brain the size of a ping pong ball I don't always feel it best to wait for DH to come home and leave the nasty little disgusting creatures hanging around (or not) until then. EWWWWWWW! They disgust me.
I'll serve in the military. I'll work for Brinks and wear a gun and deliver money to some of the worse places on bad sides of town and fill ATM machines outside banks in a ghetto. I'll work in a prison with murderers, rapist and kiddie molesters, and gang bangers and drug runners without fear........
show me a spider and I'll screech like a little girl and dance like Michael Jackson! Even house spiders are enough to send me into a tizzy and set me off having me running out of a room. My husband laughs. I don't find it amusing. Glad he does.
Does anyone think it had something to do with an older brother who, being a typical young boy, thought it was cute to torment and tease his "bratty, annoying" younger sister by chasing her around the yard or throwing Daddy Long Legs at her or dangling them in her face or over her head claiming he put them in her hair?
Nahhh...this wouldn't have anything to do with it! Not THAT. Definitely not the plethora of deadly spiders that roam freely out here in our yards and garages and even the most SANE PEOPLE living here pokes, prods, and examines everything before they either touch it or move it. Nooooo...none of this stuff, right?

I probably won't be with you guys tomorrow or the next day. The 7th is Dave's birthday and tomorrow I'll be cooking :D Yes, I actually love cooking! We're having a few friends over too which is always nice. Mostly Dave's coworkers so they vary in age from mid 30's through 60s but they are all people he works closely with on a regular basis and considers friends.
Of course there's always got to be that one. You know...that one.
That one that is just a miserable, difficult, unhappy human being who goes out of their way to try and make everyone else the same way and is always petulant, pouty, bored and rude. Problem is I can't exclude that "one" because she is his good friend's live in girlfriend (no, not the slobs), has some kind of dysfunctional personality disorder where she is symbiotic and can't let him go anywhere unless she's literally attached to him. For some reason he's fine with it.
O.K. I'm fine with it. She makes him happy. Good for him. I don't understand why but I'm glad he's happy. He deserves to be and I don't have to live with her. He does. I do, however, have to put up with her while she's here. Even my husband, who likes and tolerates everyone doesn't like her.
We had Chris (his name) over for dinner because he helped us move. It just so happened it was spaghetti that day. Not planned. Spur of the moment. We made our final and last trip back to the old house just taking the plants and what was left in the fridge/freezer. We had a cooler full of ice with items to go into the new fridge/freezer here.
One of them was spaghetti sauce. I had made a batch before and froze some previously. It was there. I didn't have to make it. So I thought spaghetti with my sauce would be so much nicer than fast food or getting a pizza or grabbing something from a deli. It was there already; easy to defrost in the microwave and then warm in the pan. I knew where the pots and pans were. All I had to do was boil noodles.
Everyone was happy with the nice but spontaneous dinner. When one moves one does not plan dinner or plan on cooking dinner that day. One takes out what is available and eats it, goes to some place to eat. or gets pizza delivered.
She, of course glued to him and not having even lifted or opened a box, complained she wasn't hungry. She pouted on the couch. He ate and then said he had to take Amanda (PITA) elsewhere because by now she would be hungry. Ohhhh Kaaaay. Fine.
After we were settled I had them over for an actual planned dinner of 3 cheese lasagna made from scratch, home made meatballs and grilled Italian sausage on the side; a salad, and some home made black olive tapenade spread to serve with...yes...HOMEMADE fresh baked bread I sweated over all day, baked and timed to come out of the oven 1/2 before the meal so it would still be warm! (Keep in mind I'm not a "baker" per se)
I mean I busted my @$$ on this meal because Chris would not take money for his help so I rewarded him with food. He ate at my house pre his relationship with (PITA) and looooooved my cooking so I did this as a special thank you to him.Despite his appearance he has wonderful manners is a great guest and lots of fun. He knows how to behave appropriately and has good social graces.
The PITA again pouted and complained and wouldn't eat!
She had the audacity, I mean the nerve, I'm talking more [email protected](($ than you find on a tennis court to say out loud to me, "I don't like lasagna. I only like Caesar salads.I don't eat sausage and I won't eat the meatballs because they're not all beef (I use both beef and pork) and they have onion in it, and the olive stuff looks disgusting. Couldn't you have made something else? Every time we eat here it's pasta. Is that ALL you know how to cook?"
"WE? WE?...WEEEEE eat here?" Rude cow didn't eat a thing last time and she didn't eat anything but a slice of bread this time.
I about slapped her. Dave actually walked over to me and said, go outside and have a smoke...NOW. The look on my face must have said it all because Chris put some lasagna on her plate and told her to eat it...NOW. Chris said, "I'm sorry, she's just a picky eater." Picky eater my @$4.
She's just a miserable immature B&%$# prima donna. Chris is 39. She's 26. Not my business. But she also sits around silent and pouty all day and when you try to engage her in conversation she gives monosyllabic answers or no answers or changes the subject when you try to talk about something that is of no interest to her or she doesn't quite understand rather than ask questions or listen/pretend to.
She then complains she has nothing in common with anyone although you've gone out of your way to talk only about things that would be of interest to her: HER job, HER friends, HER music,(she complained about ours being too old and us too) HER new phone, HER drag queen brother (yep..honestly!!), HER clothes, etc.

Sooooo.....that brings us to today and tomorrows cooking and Miss Thang. The heifer is going to be here again. I've had about enough of her. I swear to God Gandhi would have choked this woman.

I was drilled into me from a little kid that: "It is the host's duty to make their guest feel at home.
It is the guest's duty to remember they are not!"

I've had enough of her. Chris gets done at 3:00 today. I plan on telling him nicely because he's a good guy and he gets just that concept. He "gets it".

Chris gets it is my husband's birthday. I am not working. I no longer have the money to spend on gifts or going out. My gift is going out of the way to make the house look as clean and sparkling and nice as possible. To make a wonderful HOME MADE restaurant worthy meal. I'm having DAVE'S friends over and making HIS BIRTHDAY as special as possible without any unhappiness. It is to let HIM do what HE wants, eat what HE wants, watch what HE wants and listen to the music HE likes that day without any complaints from anyone. It is all about and for Dave...not Amanda (PITA).

I'm going to tell Chris to make abundantly clear to Miss Thang she has 3 choices for dinner: Take it, go to McDonald's to eat before or after the party, or not come to my home at all!
She WILL sit there, be polite, PARTICIPATE in conversations that do not revolve around her, shut her mouth about the food served, the music, and not complain about having nothing in common with anyone because they're too "old".
Nobody made her date someone much older than her. That was her choice. If she can socialize and find common ground with an older boyfriend she can do so with his older friends. BUT I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF HER! (Rude cow). If she can't do this then don't let the door hit her in her wide @$$ on the way out to go get something to eat and she isn't welcome back....he is.

So stay tuned for the trauma and drama!
Tomorrows menu is Mexican because that is my husband's favorite!
We're having:
Main course: Chicken and cheese enchiladas;
Grilled flank steak with fajita style vegetables (husband wants to play on the grill...eye roll)
with fresh red and green salsa (BETH...could have used all them 'maters!)

Side Dish: amazing homemade Spanish rice;
a simple green salad with tomatoes, jicama, and queso fresco, and radishes.

Cocktails: Martinis (Husband hates Tequila so no Margaritas)
OR if preferred wine that is a medium body, crisp fruity white ( new rule is "heavy food"
"light-er body" wine; spicy hot food go to sweeter wine) Haven't selected which one yet.

Non alcoholic: Peach iced tea with fresh mint.

Dessert: Double layer chocolate cake from scratch; with HOME MADE chocolate fudge icing.
Beverage: Iced coffee OR hot coffee with or without orange liquor in it based on preference.

Needless to say I'll be very, very busy...but gladly so. It is the one nice thing I can and still do and am proud to and like showing off with.


Wish you guys were here to share it. I know you would all appreciate it, if not you would all at least have the good manners and common decency not to say so.
Plus it would be fun to have more company and get to see everyone in person.

Talk to you after the party and probably after I choke that miserable child.
I hear wise cactus calling me to come have a good pre party chat with him. :D
Peace. Out
TTC/AG

Pic #1 my beaver tail prickly
Pic #2 my neighbors prickly I dunno. Almost the size of a bush since it has been there 20 years. The glochids are pretty fierce on it although it is a spectacularly beautiful plant
Pic #3. Me hamming it up for my mom with the new Cows tongue prickly I put in the day before.
Pic #4. The Prickly I dunno versus automobile. HUGE plant. Beautiful. From what I can see no spines/glochids on the pads but this is the one I got the fruit off of that fit in a cereal bowl. The fruit had glochids.
Pic #5. Self explanatory considering the next 2 days. Wise cactus suggest this pose both indoors and outside on rocks while sitting under him listening to his tutelage.



This message was edited Sep 5, 2015 7:29 AM


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