Is it Good or Bad for a Grandmother to Live in Retirement Home

Dallas, TX

I recently had my grandparents shifted into a retirement home since it was difficult for me to work and take care of them at the same time. My parents live in a different state so I have to manage my garndma. I moved her to a home healthcare which have great services and fun activities to keep her busy. I don't know whether I did the right thing or not. Any suggestions on what to do?

munich, Germany

actually, the right thing is to ask your grandmother if she wants to be in retirement center or not. Also you need to come to her often. If you have possibilities, there is a great decision to buy apartments for her near you or to buy apartments in Latvia , for example

This message was edited Feb 23, 2021 12:49 PM

Little Ferry, NJ

I think it depends if you have a huge family to take care of her then there should be no need but if you are a small family working then you should ask her if she wants to go to a retirement home since it would be a good place for her where she would not only be taken care of but enjoy the rest of her life.

Kansas City, MO

It's a complicated question. It takes time before you know if it's right or wrong. You need to get your mother's opinion and decide together with her. We had that question, my father refused, and we accepted it. It's not right for everyone. I am sure it's better to be near.

Catalonia , Spain

I agree with Alex992 but there remains the fact of financial and overall health. If your family makes a combined decision on what right for your grandmother than it would be the right one since you all know what is best for her. Although do make sure that you all have easy access to being close to her.

Oakland, CA(Zone 9b)

If you vetted the facility thoroughly and were satisfied, try not to give in to doubts. It's natural but remember you are doing the best you can. You have a job and will someday have to manage your own retirement!

One thing we forget is that socialization is important to almost everyone. It's a very rare person (I'm married to one) who can manage day after day without seeing anyone, and not get depressed from isolation.

My MIL lived with us for 7 yrs but it was not optimal for any of us. She needed more routine and socialization than we could provide for her. Even taking classes at the local senior centers twice a week didn't help.

Moving her to a lovely seniorcare facility revitalized her. Her dementia symptoms lessened - most people couldn't tell, in fact - and she was so much happier. The people were nice, the facility was safe, the routine of the daily schedule was comforting, and the food was what she wanted (she could ask for ice cream every day, LOL).

Moral: the only highlight of a senior's day should not consist of the mailman's arrival. It was great when MIL discovered life could still be fun, even at age 85!

Good luck to you and your grandmother as both of you adjust to these changes in your lives.

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